Sep 30, 2011

My New York Diaries - Part 30

I'm in the process of writing my story of when I was living in NYC studying acting. There's a lot to my story and for many years it's been so private and special it was hard to even talk about. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times :) If you're just tuning in, I suggest you start at Part I for it to make sense. All links in order at the bottom of this blog entry. I promise it's a juicy read. These entries often include actual journal entries from that time in my life. I'm so grateful I documented so much! Once I finish here, I hope to expand into a book. I'm posting these frequently but they'll also be interspersed with real time blogs :) Thanks for reading & supporting!

*All names are changed

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The day of the audition came. "Balm in Gilead". I was obsessed with playing Darlene. I had to get that role. Every student in my class would obviously play a part, and in some cases there would be roles that were double (and even triple) cast. I don't remember my audition, but I do remember observing and being surprised at the nerves of my classmates. I walked into the bathroom to see a fellow student practicing in the mirror. In the mirror? I'd never heard of or thought of such a thing. That certainly wasn't anything we'd been why was she doing that? Lynne laughed and told her she'd been guilty of the same thing. I couldn't believe it. They were breaking acting rules!

I was nervous about Lynne. She was such a great actor, what if she got Darlene? And then something totally unexpected happened. She quit the play. She felt so overwhelmed with the school load and her work [bartender] load she knew she wouldn't be able to take on the play as well. She had a big talk with our teachers, remained on good terms, and was going to sit this experience out. How she could do that? I couldn't relate. This was it! This was what we were all working for! Then why was she even here? It made me a little disappointed in her. But I didn't get what it would have been like to work and go to school. I can only imagine looking back on it now how impossible it must have seemed. It seemed nearly impossible for me at times as it was.

When the cast list went up...there was good news...and there was bad news.

Myself and one other girl, Claire were the only two names not yet assigned to a role. What?! Tucker said he wasn't sure where he was going to put us. I didn't know how to take that. Why? What had he seen, or not seen in me? Why wasn't I his Darlene? Was this going to be "Museum" all over again? I dreamt of going out with a bang, with a starring role. What did this mean? Give me something to do!

The role of Darlene was to be played by Kim. Kim! Who had set up the meeting with Adam Pascal backstage on my birthday the previous year.

I'm not sure how it unfolded, but shortly after that Tucker announced Darlene was going to be played by Kim, Claire...and me! The way the performances broke down, Kim would still have more shows than us.

Then rehearsals began. It was incredible. And everything changed. It became very clear that myself and Claire were the better fits for Darlene. And then we were given the majority of performances.

I'll never forget walking into the bathroom on a very upset and crying Kim. I felt so awkward. On one hand I felt bad her performances had been taken away from her...but Claire and I were the what was I supposed to say?

As Darlene, I'd be tackling a twenty two minute monologue and full nudity. I worked hard on memorizing every day, with the help of Sean and Oscar at school. We'd sit out on the chairs in the hall between classes and they'd be on book for me as I added on page after page after page.

I couldn't believe it. I got my dream. I was Darlene. I had the lead of the big show at the end of my New York training. To this day I can't even express how much it all meant (and still means) to me.

There was a lot that was going to go into putting on this show. I was going to get a taste of what it was like to take on such a large role and challenge myself in ways I'd wanted to but hadn't had the chance to do yet.

I was also getting ready to celebrate a big deal birthday. Twenty One. Finally.

What should I do for the big night? Where should I go? Who should be there? This had to be memorable. Two friends from back home, Jack and Julie had decided they were going to fly out to celebrate with me and I couldn't wait to see them and show them my new city.

Part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:
Part 5:
Part 6:
Part 7:
Part 8:
Time to Press Pause:
Part 9:
Part 10:
Part 11:
Part 12:
Part 13 (with an extra shot)
Part 14:
Part 15:
Part 16:
Part 17:
Part 18 (September 11th)
Part 19:
Part 20:
Part 21:
Part 22:
Part 23:
Part 24:
Part 25:
Part 26:
Part 27:
Part 28:
Part 29:

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