Sep 13, 2012

NYC bound once again...

If you are a loyal reader of my blog then you know how I feel about NYC (In fact, you might have read the 40 posts that make up "My New York Diaries").  I love it there.  NYC has been my mistress since I was 10 years old.  I am always drawn to her.  Sometimes we fight, but she always has a part of my heart.  We are never finished.

Life is so funny.  If I can boil down all I've learned so far, it's that there is no such thing as sticking to a plan.

You may also know that my life completely changed nearly four months ago, since Chuck.  I find myself silently saying, "Thank you, Chuck", daily.

I said it before and a I'll say it again, these last few months have been everything and everything has been in these last few months.

If you told me at the beginning of the year that the chain of events since then would have led me to this spot today, I'd never have believed it.

I feel a special connection to theatre all over again.  Every so often you fall in love all over again.  I've realized that's where I've ended up right now.  In love.

Everything has been new since the shedding of my old skin four months ago.  I see differently with these new eyes.  I've fallen in love all over again.  With my husband.  My pets.  My family.  My life.  My career.  It's all new.

Because of this I have a rekindled drive to learn, to get better, to immerse in what I love, to live.

When I graduated from high school, I had a scholarship to Southern Utah University.  I wanted to study Shakespeare.  But at that time, I knew a small town would have been suffocating to me.  Then Westminster theatre department courted me.  They talked me into it.  I figured I'd try it there a year while I figured out what school to go to in NYC and I had a great time.  But as soon as I could I was off to NYC where I graduated form the wonderful Atlantic Theater Company Acting school.  I took summer courses through NYU's CAP 21 (musical theatre) and  a few years later fall courses through Juilliard.  When I came home I was lucky to keep working, and eventually, working professionally.

I've always known I love acting because it is never the same.  We are different people all through life, every few years.  Everything we go through changes our relationship and ability to the stage and roles we play.  We are never, ever done learning and getting better.  The reason why we perform is a constant question and the answer changes through time.

Right now I can best tell you I do it because it is my particular outlet to be part of storytelling.  Storytelling is essential to remind us we are all much more alike than we remember.  It is a way to heal.  It is something to relate to.  To give comfort.  To give hope.  To be part of the same whole in a world where we so often forget that.  I like to participate in that reminder.  I feel most like me when I'm doing so.  I feel most alive when watching it done well.

What I learn through acting, through my spiritual journey, through life is always the same lesson in a different way.  That all things come down to one thing: we are part of the same whole.  We truly are all one.  Made of the same stuff, reflections of each other.

Synchronicity is everywhere.  I won't go into those details but a chain of them led me to this perfect timing of being able to fly out the morning after the beautiful "The Winter's Tale" closes (Sept. 30) and stay with good friends through mid November.

I will miss my sweetheart and pup so much I want to cry every time I think about it.  It will be the longest time I've ever been away from them.  But I have also recently learned that time is tricky and that everything is so very, very fleeting.  If my sweetheart wasn't this incredible, I wouldn't be able to go.  Because he is the way he is, he fuels me to follow my heart.

I'm going to immerse myself in what I love.  For this NYC trip, and in life.

I'm going to be studying Shakespeare with Seth Barrish of The Barrow Group as well as various workshops, including Red Bull Theater.  I am going to visit friends, my favorite places, read and write.

An artists sabbatical, in a way.  I have no idea what to expect.  But as I've learned, such is life.

*favorite previous entries:

The Summer My Uncle Died 

The Always of Opposites

I'm Going to Need a Minute

Tweet me: @DeenaMarie


  1. What a wonderful opportunity! So happy for you that you get to take advantage of it. And when you come back Imma make you fall in love with frosting. :)

  2. So many envies. Of course on the topic of storytelling, you should have many to tell on your return. I hope to hear some.

  3. OMG OMG OMG!!!! This is sooo awesome! I´m so happy for you Deena!! And this happens so soon!! OMG!!! Love you!!

  4. i agree with so many of your sentiments about acting. i have loved following this incredible journey you've been having, despite how voyeuristic that sounds. it is true, we are all one and made of the same stuff. we are all connected. i feel honored to represent humanity on stage and i see that you do too. kudos to you for following your heart! give nyc my best :)