How others see you. It's not what you think!

I think from time to time about the discrepancies between the way we experience ourselves (as only we can) and the way others must view us.  How different an answer we'd get if we were to ask those that know us to varying degrees, to tell us what they see.

I guessed that if I were to ask my social media friends and followers for a word or two to describe me, or give me their impression of me, it would be very different from what I would say about myself. What would strike someone instantly upon meeting me, or spending time with me? Would most people give a superficial answer? Who sees deeper?

I was right that the answers were different than what I expected.  I was shocked to end up with a giant list of words (full list below).  What a variety! It was incredible to see what words I got multiples of.  To see what those multiples were.  Coming in at the top with four each were: Driven, Inspiring,  Lovely, Talented.  In second place with three each were: Ambitious, Beautiful, Effervescent, Funny, Hilarious, Kind, Loving, Magical, Unicorn. 

It's also an interesting experiment to see if we come across to others the way we think we do or hope we might.  Of those top thirteen words above, guess how many would have been on my own list, were I the one making it? Four.  Only four of them.  One of the words in the top thirteen, I'm not sure I've ever really even liked.  I appreciate everyone who took the time to comment, so I chose not to use names, or specify words.

As for my feelings on the master list, they are mixed.  Let me start off by saying it's good.  It's wonderful, really.  To have this incredible reference of uplifting words from others.  It's mind blowing. But there are definitely a couple of words that make me cringe.  Make me wonder where in the world someone would come up with that! Words that don't ring true to me.  Others surprise me.  Some take my breath away.  Some make me feel as though I could never live up to what people in my world seem to think I am.

In the end, most aren't what I would have chosen.  One of my top three words I'd use for myself doesn't even appear anywhere on the list! But boy, I'd never be able to come up with a list anywhere near this long.  It's unbelievable.

I was nervous to ask.  The only way to do the experiment was to be a the guinea pig.  I felt vulnerable and was afraid of coming off as narcissistic.  "Tell me what you think of me!" So I didn't specify.  I didn't ask for positive comments only.  But I didn't get a mean one.  Not really.  It's all there, I left nothing out.

I walk away having learned a lot from this experiment.:

~Others definitely do see you differently than you see yourself.
~They might even see more in you than you can.
~You realize your shortcomings much more than those around you.
~People are generally kinder and more observant than you might expect.
~I placed unfair limits on what the outcome would be, expecting superficial answers.
~I was blown away by how deep and descriptive everyone was. (There were less labels, more description.)
~Maybe I am more than the handful of words I would have picked for myself.
~We are all more beautiful and powerful than we think we are.
~We all impact, effect, and inspire each other.
~Tell each other the good.  We all need to hear it.  If we don't how we will ever know?

For all of the surprises that came from this, one thing was solidified that means everything.  To me, the biggest compliment of all is when someone tells me I've inspired them.  It's the biggest compliment I can ever give to another person.  It's the essential essence of life.  Inspiration.  To have that word listed in the very top…wow.  It's what I would hope for.  It's what I strive for.  I thank you.  Deeply.

What a humbling, learning experience!

Thank you, everyone who participated.  You helped me learn a little more about myself, and others.  

So now, I dare you to try it! Let yourself be surprised! Mull it over.  Who are you? Who are you to others? Most importantly, what does it teach you?

Thank you for reading and participating, let me know how your experiment goes!



(I was going to alphabetize, but I got lazy)

Amazing
Alluring
Astonishing
Audacious
Ambitious (3)
A wholly brilliant person
Accepting
Adorable
A positive energy to be in touch with the universe
Beautiful (3)
Brave
Bold (2)
Bratz Doll
Celestial
Classy (2)
Clandestine
Caring
Compassionate (2)
Critical Thinker
Confident
Curious (2)
Determined (2)
Delightful
Driven (4)
Dynamic
Dream Manifesto
Disco
Enchanting
Enthusiastic
Endearing
Effervescent (3)
Encouraging
Energetic (2)
Express
Enterprising
Earnest
Funny (3)
Fun (2)
Fierce (2)
Fabulous
Free Spirited
Genuine (2)
Grounded
Gracious
Got it all
Happy
Hilarious (3)
Hopeful
Helpful
Inspiring (4)
Irrepressible
Inner Beauty Shines Out
Intelligent
Jubilantly Bohemian
Kindhearted
Kind (3)
Luminous
Lovely (4)
Lover of Animals
Loyal (2)
Loving (3)
Lola
Magical (3)
Multi-Talented (2)
Nicer than I heard
Optimist

One of Us

Poised
Positive
Prettier than initially thought (inside, not outside only)
Professional (2)
Present. You seen to live in the moment & seize opportunities - whether they be to laugh or cry or admire or perform.

Quirky

Regal

Refreshing

Ray of Sunshine

Really Pretty Skin

Seeker

Smiley

Sweet

Self-Expressed
Sincere
Smart
Sparkly
Stunning
Talented (4)
Talented in so many areas it's disgusting

Timeless
Thoughtful
Tenacious
Ubiquitous
Unicorn (3)
Uplifting
Vibrant
Vivacious
Witty
Whimsical
Witty
Wow, she sparkles



Thank you for reading,

xo


Deena Marie

Aura

Want to know what color your Aura is?

Take the quiz on Pamala Oslie's Life Colors City website!
I love stuff like this.  I definitely see aspects that are right on in each of the three I am.
Violet, Crystal, Green.

Glad I happened to catch her on Ricki Lake today!

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Violet

Violets are the inspirational visionaries, leaders and teachers who are here to help save the planet. Most Violets feel drawn to educate the masses, to inspire higher ideals, to improve the quality of life on the planet, or to help save people, animals and the environment.

All Violets have an inner sense that they are here to do something important, that their destiny is greater than that of the average person. Most Violets have felt this way since childhood. As children, many Violets imagined becoming famous, or traveling the planet, possibly joining humanitarian causes such the Peace Corp. Many of these charismatic personalities take on roles as leaders and teachers, while other Violets prefer to reach people through music, film or other art form.

Because this era is currently the "Violet Age," any Violets who are not accomplishing what they came here to do are experiencing an inner “push” — even an inner “earthquake.” Inner forces seem to be shaking them up and pushing them to move into action, to fulfill their life purpose. Violets know they are here to do something significant. However, they aren't always sure what that something is or how to accomplish it.

Many Violets were taught as children that their dreams and aspirations were unrealistic, so they have lost touch with their original visions. It's important for Violets to reconnect with their life purpose and vision, and to take action. Otherwise they will always feel unfulfilled. They will always sense something is missing from their lives. Violets need to learn to slow down long enough to listen to their inner voice and to connect with their higher vision.

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Crystal

Crystal is a rare Life Color. Crystals have clear auras and are known as the "aura chameleons." Like chameleons, their auras will change colors to match those of the people they are connecting with at the time. They then take on the characteristics, behavior patterns, emotions and thoughts of that color.

Consequently, in power Crystals can get along quite well with almost anyone. Yellows , for example, feels they can relate to Crystals who, when they are with them, act and think like Yellows . Later, when the same Crystals spend time with Sensitive Tans, the Tans can feel as if they have found kindred spirits.

However, the Crystals' inconsistencies can also confuse people. One minute Crystals think and behave like Greens . A short while later, they can act like Blues . The more they connect and bond with others, the more their personalities change.

Because Crystals tend to absorb the colors of other people's auras, people can, at times, feel an energy drain when they are in the presence of Crystals. In power, Crystals can be a clear conduit or channel for healing energy. Being natural healers, the Crystals' gift is to help their clients clear blockages, thereby enabling the clients' own natural healing processes to take place.

While healing, balanced Crystals are able to keep their thoughts and emotions out of the way, making the healing more pure. Crystals do not always understand their healing abilities. It can often frighten and confuse them or cause them to feel overwhelmed. These rare souls are often physically fragile and delicate.

Because of their unusual sensitivity, they can only heal one person at a time. They then need to go to a peaceful place to cleanse their aura. Working with too many people can short-circuit their system.

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Green

Greens are some of the most powerful and intelligent people in the aura spectrum. Greens are extremely bright. They process information and ideas quickly; jumping from steps one to ten. They do not like dealing with all the steps and details in between.

A project that is too detailed is tedious and boring for Greens . They prefer to develop an idea, organize a plan, and then delegate someone else to take care of the details.

Greens are very drawn to money, power, and business. These quick-thinkers are very organized and efficient. They write lists and efficiently check off the items on the list as they are completed. Greens recognize patterns and discover solutions very quickly.

When Greens are in their power, they can accomplish anything. They love to set goals and are determined to achieve them. Greens are “movers and shakers” when it comes to taking action. They are also typically the workaholics on the planet.

Greens are highly competitive and enjoy challenges. They thrive on taking risks. Gambling is common for Greens , especially if there is a potential for large winnings.

Being strong-willed, these powerful personalities are determined to have their own way, which they usually feel is the right way. A person is rarely able to win an argument with Greens.