Mar 6, 2012

Sylvia, still.

Designer: Krista Nielson
Photographer: Todd Collins
Hair: Tyrel Knight
MUA: Karl Geiger
Model: Deena Marie Manzanares

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Still currently fueled, comforted and inspired by Sylvia...

"I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig in the story.

From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out.

I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I should choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet."

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“When they asked me what I wanted to be I said I didn’t know.
"Oh, sure you know," the photographer said.
"She wants," said Jay Cee wittily, "to be everything.”

-The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

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I think in poetic terms and from time to time I come into contact with a new muse that wakes up my true self and it's musical, it's guttural, I am literally gutted open and what wants to come out but doesn't know how is released...I sometimes feel stuck and stifled. I am afflicted by wanderlust. I am full of it. I am so full that I am sometimes completely suffocated by wanderlust. My entire being fills with the smoke of it and I am suffocated from the insides.

When things have become real, that's when the heart bottoms out and it is sometimes good and it is sometimes bad.

Life begins with acceptance. Acceptance of what is and what isn't. Everything is connected. We are all one. Synchronicity. Accept and allow. The dark and the light.

Tweet me: @DeenaMarie

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