Dear Hawaii...

Fourteen years ago I spent a few weeks in Hawaii. It changed my life. I'd forgotten the impact as the years went by. I just got back from my second trip there. A gift for my husbands graduation. I can't stop dreaming about the ocean. I felt like I was in / on the water for days after. I can still smell the air.

I forgot what that place does to me. Two moments in particular my heart swelled, seizing me. I was so open. So present. So filled with our essence of love and happiness. I thought I would truly burst.

Hawaii is magic. Filled with simplicity, purity, and healing. It healed me in ways I didn't even know I needed to be healed. It teaches me. I bring back knowledge and new happiness each time. I am gently reminded of the essentials I've forgotten.


This time:

There are so very many ways to
Raise a child
Find what home is

There is no wrong way to have a life
Be it in a desert
On the sea
In any country

The world is wide
and small
we are all connected
you are me, I am you

Slow down
Stop and think
Take your time
Notice
Just be
Be present
Reconnect
Get out of your element
Find your element somewhere new
Put yourself in different weather
In new air
Breathe it in
Breathe

I will hold out
I will not be made small, by myself or others
I will make the scale bigger
I will not be scared
I will remember that I can trust the journey

I wasn't ready to say goodbye.

"Sometimes you just can't take one last look, and feel satisfied to leave. Not ready to come home. Not even a little bit. I was in Hawaii only one other time, 14 years ago, and I remember feeling exactly the same. There are moments here where your heart is just so completely wide open, and then it's a little bit broken at the goodbye."
-5.14.2015