The first time.

The first time.

I could ask why.  Why the first time of anything is so meaningful.  

Why the first time for anything and everything is so powerful.  But the answer is obvious.  

Because nothing came before it.  Events can and will only follow.  

The first time of something good or bad is defining.  Life shaping.  I've been thinking about firsts, being that this was what I've truly counted as my first funeral.  I've been to a handful of them before, but but it wasn't anyone close to me like this.  I've marked this as number one.  This was it.  

I've also been thinking how nothing ever quite compares after, and what that will mean in the future.  Will funerals be easier?! That seems absurd.  But possible.  

We build scare tissue with every first.  
We grow resilient.  
We grow strong.  
We grow tired.  

“When you've suffered a great deal in life, each additional pain is both unbearable and trifling.” 
― Yann Martel, Life of Pi

 I think that's it for now.  

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